I'll never know
by BassNotBass
Summary: I'll never understand why Anakin fell.


Wow' that's all I can really think as stare at this photo. It's of me and Ashoka from the very first day we met. The local newcasters were taking lots of pictures and she begged me to take one with her.

"Please Rex? Its for my mom so she will know I survived my first battle." She had begged with her big baby blue eyes. I agreed and a few weeks later she sent me a copy of it. I never told her but I kept it in my armour, every mission. She was at first a little sister, then she grew to mean more to me. I never knew what it was until after the Blue Nile virus scare, as I watched her fall to my arms, my face the last thing we both thought she'd see.

After that we admitted our feelings and had been secretly dating right up till the accident. Looking back on it I should have seen it coming. The General was acting strangely, sometimes his eyes glowed yellow like a Sith, but I always thought it was a trick of the light. He had random bouts of anger that I felt a Jedi shouldn't have. But I was a clone so I never voiced my suspisions. Maybe if I would have she would still be alive.

The ship was down on a recon mission on some force forsaken planet that I to this day don't know the name of. The ships main power was out and Ashoka haad been trying to fix it. She was sitting in the middle of a bunch of wires, wires that connected everything in the ship together. They were supposed to be shut off. I was next to her filling out paper work next to her, near the wall. I heard the power come back on before they got to the actual wires. But I didn't have time to react.

I'll never forget her screams. How could I? She was the love of my life. And I couldn't help her as she burned from the inside out. I tried to help her but my brothers who came when they heard the screams, stopped me. It saved my life. But I didn't care about my life I just wanted to save hers. I held her gaze as the life left her big blue eyes. Just as the life left her, the lights power turned back off.

I remember running to the control room to see which dim witted brother had turned the power off ready to beat them to death. But when we got there, the only one standing there was the General. He had his hand on the switch frozen. He turned around and did the unthinkable. He did a mind trick. At the time I didn't realize it only later did I find out. He made us think that there was a short in the wires that turned on the power.

A few days later Anakin fell to the darkside. And he and Palpatine carried out the worst genocide in the Galaxy. Order 66. In minutes almost all of the Jedi died by the hands of my brothers. I only killed one Jedi. A padawan like She was. As I watched the life leave her eyes I lost it. I ran away to the council room. She had always liked that room she wanted to be part of it one day. But when I got there I saw the general standing around dead younglings.

"I saved her Rex"

"Sir?"

"Ashoka, I knew this was coming. I saved her from it. She died peacefully."

"Peacefully? All do respect Sir, you didn't watch the woman you loved die! Couldn't help her as you watched the life leave her body! You didn't have to stand by and watch the one you love get burned from the inside out and not be able to do anything about it!"  
>I whispered, "Or have to listen to her screams, everynight since then. Live with the guilt."<p>

I guess angered by my outcry He electrocuted me. Which knocked me out but gave me my memory back. I knew what really happened on the day Ashoka died.

When I awoke a stranger was there at my side. Its mechanical breathing and heartbeat was foreign.

"Captain Rex you will never speak of what happened in the council room" and then It turned and left.

I learned later of Anakin's fall and Vader's rise. Of how he killed his wife and their unborn child.

I never understood why he fell, why he killed Ashoka, his wife unborn child, his family the Jedi. I never will.

I look at the picture again and put my blaster to my temple and whisper, "Ashoka I love you" and pull the trigger

R & R please! Any suggestions would be nice!


End file.
